Thursday, November 24, 2011

Thankful for Faithful Hearts

A few days ago I was startled to realize a feeling of anxiety--even terror--had entered my heart about the concept of parenting. I had a feeling of being overwhelmed and worried, feeling less than adequate for the task, etc. It wasn't a very pleasant day. But in my New Testament study yesterday morning, I came across these verses in James 1:2-4 that reminded me God is there, even when it seems He is silent. I felt my faith renewed and my patience with myself and my son increased. Those verses alone may not be "magical" at all times and for every person's situation, but for me in that moment of reading them with prayerful heart, the words invited God's spirit to comfort and teach me. I am grateful for the scriptures!
Jerry and I side-by-side watched this new Mormon Message clip--sort of a different one, no? Personal interview style. We were especially touched by the parts where Elder Nelson says to have realistic expectations and to focus on improvement rather than perfection--"perfection comes in the next life." It wasn't as dramatic as Elder Nelson's flight experience, but during our flight home from visiting Hong Kong exactly one year ago, we felt extended turbulence that held everyone's attention. It was disturbing enough that I recall thinking, "Is this going to be how my life will end??" with some real contemplation. My little brother who was on the flight sitting in a different section also said he had similar thoughts. At that moment in a dipping plane ride, I probably didn't have the perfect calm of an apostle, but didn't feel what I would call real fear either. I felt my life was generally in order, because I have always tried to live according to true principles. I am thankful to have a clear knowledge of God's plan of happiness. I am thankful to have been blessed with strong faith to help me through the challenges of life. It is my greatest "possession" to know the restored Gospel of Jesus Christ is true!

Hope everybody else out there feels as blessed as me on this Thanksgiving day.


Valerie said...

A very nice post, Courtney. A Happy Thanksgiving to the Tams and love to you!

Morgan said...

Oh, Courtney! Don't worry about feeling inadequate in your parenting. We ALL have those days! I think that if we didn't, we might not be able to say we were being GOOD parents. How can you be a good parent if you aren't being introspective and second-guessing your every move? Any parent who cares has moments of feeling like a failure. It comes with the territory and is totally normal! You are doing a great job with Lo! He is a happy, smart, social, multilingual child and that shows me that you are doing an amazing job as a parent! Keep up the good work!